Approaching the ten(10 meaning she’s one hot mama!!)
Be relaxed in your approach
OK, so she’s a 10. But you’re not a bad catch yourself, champ. Confidence is an important facet of any approach, but it’s especially crucial when approaching the intimidating 10. She’s likely well aware of her appeal, and she has certainly seen her share of stammering, fidgeting would-be suitors. While the charming befuddlement of a Hugh Grant is often quite effective, let’s bypass that route and center on a stable, calm and secure front. Remember: The courtship process involves two people. While you’re attempting to deal with her significant physical appeal, she’s sizing you up as well, and chances are that she’s become quite skilled at weighing and measuring.
Some don’ts to remember: Don’t quickly offer to buy her a drink, don’t hesitate to respond too often, don’t let your eyes dart around the room, and don’t fixate on the safe spot three inches in front of your shoes. You’re probably aware of these obvious tips, but the hottest of the hot can have bizarre effects on a man. Sometimes, her beauty can even render all your experience and training useless, simply because your mind is clouded with her very image. Whatever you do, maintain your dignity and confidence, speak lightly, settle yourself in a comfortable position, meet her eyes every once in a while during conversation, and feel free to crack a joke or two. Just relax and be… well, normal.
Don’t let her beauty intimidate
Let’s face it, approaching a 10 is risky business even for the accomplished Player. For a normal guy, it’s downright terrifying. Take advantage of your own courage and realize that you’re probably one of a very small handful that would chance an approach. Logically — and mathematically — speaking, if most men look at her and say, “Yeah, right,” then your chances greatly increase. Now calculate the number of men who actually made the nerve-wracking trek across the room and impressed her. Probably not that many. If you take all of this into consideration, and factor in your own finely honed flirting ability, it becomes surprisingly clear that you’re in a darn good position. Granted, this may not ensure an easier encounter, but it gives you a definite edge. Don’t forget to recognize the embarrassing fact that many men are petrified of beautiful women.
The benefit of having a hot wingwoman and how to properly ignore a 10’s looks… Of course, even the Player is human, so don’t kid yourself into thinking her beauty has no effect whatsoever. There are, however, a variety of ways to overcome the potential intimidation obstacle. First, take solace in the fact that you have plenty of experience in approaching women. You’re better equipped to handle the situation than most. Second, the competent lady’s man understands an initial rejection isn’t the end of the world, and follow-up opportunities may present themselves in the future. Third, this isn’t an all-or-nothing scenario — you can always fall back on an 8 or 9 without much difficulty.
Use a hot wingwoman
If you can prove that you’ve already conquered the 10 challenge — or if you can at least make it appear as though you have — you’re halfway to success. Women are social creatures and often take note of how their peers respond to men. Therefore, if they see you with a lady of equal hotness, and that lady has nothing but glowing praise for the man by her side (that’s you, genius), then you’ve got a foot in the door. Perhaps you may recall George Costanza’s theory of the “forbidden city,” and once his “hand was stamped,” he could “come and go as he pleased.” Despite being part of a fictional storyline, the true Player understands that philosophy holds more water than people typically believe. So, if you have a particularly stunning acquaintance who would be willing to support you in your endeavor, you should enlist her help. Just don’t select an ex; she may initially go along with it, but resort to malicious sabotage at exactly the wrong time.
It is important that your wingwoman doesn’t stick around for very long. Once your foot is in the door, you don’t need any help to push it open. She should, however, pop up to offer some details or anecdotes that make you look good, make it clear that she is not with you, and then recede into the shadows. With the right woman and the correct timing, this has a great chance of working beautifully.
Talk about everything but her looks
Don’t make the mistake of addressing her looks in any way. Many guys love to play the indifference card in regards to a lady’s attractiveness, and while that can be useful in some cases, it’s counterproductive here. In other words, your opening line absolutely can not be, “Yeah, you probably think I only care about how you look. I’m not like that.” Attempting to convince her that you’re uninterested in her body is juvenile and insulting; almost more so than just saying, “Damn, you’re hot.” You know you care about her hotness. She knows you care. Just don’t make it a topic of conversation for any reason. There are plenty of other topics under the sun to choose from to kick things off, but be sure that you don’t venture into uncharted waters with unfamiliar subjects. It’s a bad idea to take the chance.
How to be coy and not a jerk… And on the flip side, don’t go gush about how great her personality is. All that does is reinforce a clear attempt at ignoring her good looks. So the “Wow, you have beautiful eyes” and the “Hey, you’re really funny,” remarks don’t have a place in this approach (unless she just told you a joke that was actually funny). She’s probably not an insecure individual, and she’s probably heard every form of flattery known to man or hot women. Don’t waste her time, and stay focused on a discussion that might have some real substance.
Approach her in an atypical way
This woman isn’t typical, so it might be a good idea to disregard typical approach methods. You might want to consider a negative hit, which is a more detached, perhaps even critical, approach. A 10 has heard just about every nice comment there is, so put her off guard with something she’s never heard before, such as “You know, you shouldn’t wear so much eyeliner.” The negative hit allows you to tilt the tables a bit and, hopefully, she’ll come back over the top at you. We all want people to like us. You’re not there to be insulting or offensive, but you’re not fawning, and for some reason, you’re not as “gaga” as the other guys. You also frowned at her joke that you didn’t find funny. This behavior might elicit a positive reaction from a 10.
Just keep a careful eye on your progress. If the somewhat dour demeanor isn’t having the desired effect, and she’s simply getting disgusted rather than interested, you need to regroup and try another tactic. Most importantly, the key to the negative hit is to spot any generated interest and cultivate it. In other words, you can’t be tossing the “negatives” in the face of returned intrigue; you need to respond with a small yet appropriate level of warmth. A wry smile or a chuckle lets her know she’s getting through to you.
landing the perfect 10
The 10 is a rare and beautiful thing; you need to treat it with the respect it deserves. While it’s a definite challenge, deep down, you should recognize it’s the Player’s chance to truly shine. It’s as if all your prior conquests were nothing more than training for the very moment you approach a 10, and even then, you might have to employ a variety of new tactics. Provided that you’re open to a fresh set of maneuvers, and you remain confident in your abilities, that luscious lady may soon represent a crowning achievement.